h o m e

Secretly

There exists a place

Somewhere between daydreams and memories

I can feel it

Hidden beneath your surface

My heart knows the way.

Quietly

I sneak inside

Close the door, shake the dust from my soul,

Tiptoe to the center

Curl up into the shape of your hurt

And lie with you

Finally

Warm, safe, and whole.

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plagiarism

plagiarize me

copy my words

speak my longing

sing my heartbeat

convince me they are your own

leave me breathless

reeling

convinced you created it all

my heart is yours

your heart is mine

there is no pain here

only us

it’s divine, isn’t it?

this likeness

a dream unraveling

we are traveling

through each other

a love like no others have known

you seem restless

healing

convinced I’m the source of it all

my soul is yours

your soul is mine

there is no one day

only now

it’s transcendent, isn’t it?

this bliss

you can’t accept it

a sincere gift

too many wounds

so use my words, my movements

make them yours

until the day

you feel safe enough

to love me.

pinky

I tried everything I know. I don’t want to be a stalker so I’m not sending more messages. Today I felt you hate me.

You are repulsed by something in me. Something that isn’t even there.

I am confounded that you could think so little of me and confused by how much that hurts. You matter to me. No matter what.

Didn’t mean to hurt you, or to deny your feelings. I just wish you’d talk to me. Without that I’m floating out here. Lost.

Lost.

retrograde

I can’t sleep again

You say things but you don’t mean them

Promises

Change the rules so I can’t follow

Break me up, break me in

What is this?

Maybe the truth is you don’t know

Trying to keep up but my head spins

Falling

Can you be steady, be stable, go slow?

You say things I hope you mean them

Promises

Is there anywhere we couldn’t go?

I can’t sleep again.

mercury

I’m so tired

Of giving attention

To hearts

Who look right past me

And being chased

By obsessives

Who can’t take a hint

Cruel. Ironic. Life.

enough

i told you when we met

that eventually

you would have enough of me

 

i’m soft, i’m quiet,

i’m bold and fierce

i sway between telling you everything

and keeping my lips sealed

i’m tiny and helpless

i’m large and in charge

my spirit doesn’t know halfway

i use my whole heart

i told you in the beginning

enough would be too much

and now i sit here empty handed

alone, afraid, untouched

i’m light and boisterous,

giggly and free

i’m heavy and melancholy

woe is me

i’m brilliant and capable

i crave reassurance

generous and loving

needy and smothering

 

i told you when we met

that eventually

you would have enough of me

 

(i didn’t expect it to happen so fast.)

 

give. (draft)

Give me your hand

Or if you will not

Trust me to lead you

Then lead me on and I will follow

 

Give me your heart

Or if you cannot

Trust me to love you

Then simply exist and I will admire

 

Give me your mind

Or if you dare not

Trust me to teach you

Then sit with me and let me learn

 

Give me your body

Or if you cannot

Trust me to heal you

Then lie with me and let us dream.

 

 

 

Tell me that it is so, and

I will try to believe you.

Tell me that it is

I will try to believe.

Tell me that.

I believe.

Tell me.

I will try

I will cry

I will know.

 

if

If you love me

(I think that you do)

I want you to tell the world.

Shout to the heavens, the stars, the moon

About your lovely, frustrating girl.

If I love you

(Possibly, I do)

I want to be your muse.

Inspiration, raison d’etre

The blood beneath your tattoos.

If you love me

(You say that you do)

You’ll write stories about me

About past lives, future adventures,

Our kingdom beyond the sea.

If I love you

(I say that I do)

I’ll show you my secret despair

For only you – who delight me so –

Could make me lay it bare.

If you love me

(I know that you do)

You’ll keep my heart with you.

It left my chest the day we met

In a moment of deja vu.

If I love you

(You know that I do)

Your heart is also mine.

I have always owned it, held it dear

Since the dawn of time.

 

 

 

 

 

torment

moonlight dipped

honey eyes

candy lips

satin thighs

chocolate hair

velvet skin

freckle constellations

Cheshire grin

radiant goddess

white devil, red queen

dark silhouette

possessor of dreams